What are women looking for in a man before they’ll have sex?

    Published: 06-16-2009
    Views: 29,961
    Relationship expert Gloria MacDonald discusses dating and sex, including what women look for in a man before they’ll have sex.

    Host: What are women looking for in a man before they will have sex?

    Gloria Macdonald: Women are far more complex than men in all kinds, it varies. But when we did focus groups and did surveys on a woman's definition of chemistry and what they were looking for in a man before they will have sex. There are four main things and in each one these is somewhat complex. So, the first one they are looking for is that the man is acceptable to them. So, acceptable means that he has got some level of self confidence and self respect, that he is kind, that he is generous, that he is chivalrous, a whole long laundry list of things. But the man has to acceptable to the woman. The next thing that women are looking for is that there is some future to this relationship that there is some possibility of a long term relationship here. With no possibility of a long term relationship most women are not really interested in a one night stand. It does not mean that women won't do it, but it is not what they are looking, it is not their heart's desire, it is not where they really want to go.

    The third thing women are looking for is that the man is willing to be monogamous which is different from a long term relationship. You could have a long term relationship with someone that's not monogamous, but in this case, women are looking for the fact that the man does not have his emotions spread too thin, that his emotions and his emotional ability to commit is strictly to her, that he does not have some leftover feelings for an Ex girlfriend or an Ex wife or something like that, but that she will be the soul place where his emotions are committed.

    The fourth thing women are looking for is that there is at least some level of physical attractiveness. So, for men physical attractiveness is number one in chemistry and for women, that's the lowest thing on the total poll, believe it or not. Now, women might not be able to articulate this if you told women that the last thing they are looking for is physical attractiveness, they might say, "Oh! No, that's not true.

    " But through lots and lots of research and study with professional psychologist and asking very specific questions in different ways, we actually found that the physical attractiveness for the most part is the lowest thing on the woman's total poll of a variety of things she is looking for before she will actually have sex with a man.