Gloria MacDonaldGloria MacDonald is the founder and President of Perfect Partners, The Personal Relationship Executive Search Firm, a highly successful, personalized matchmaking service. Gloria has interviewed hundreds and hundreds of single men and women and has introduced over 1500 couples. She is an expert in the field of dating and relationships, having appeared on a variety of TV and radio shows. She’s the co-author of the highly acclaimed book Laws of the Jungle: Dating for Women Over 40. She believes, and has seen through her work, that there is a perfect partner for anyone of us who truly desires to find that relationship, believes they can have it, and are willing to accept it. Gloria is an engaging and dynamic speaker and trainer who changes lives. Testimonials from people who have attended Gloria’s seminars: “Gloria uses her exceptional knowledge of real world dating and her unique and exciting style to inspire women to not give up. Truly a wonderful presenter. I would highly recommend anything she does now and in the future.” “This is the information single women and men have been waiting for.” “A truly engaging seminar. You are obviously an expert on the topic. Your knowledge, compassion, sensitivity and forthrightness was spiced with humour to create a clean and practical approach to relationship success.” “Attending your seminar has truly been an inspiration. YOU ARE AN AMAZING TRAINER!”
Host: What is the first deadly dating sin for men?
Gloria McDonald: The first sin is the sin of indecision and wimpiness. If a man can't choose a restaurant he's going to take you to have a plan for the date, forget it, he's a loser. We've heard, women after women, after women say, I work hard all day long, I make decisions all day long, I just want a man who can have a plan, who can have enough initiative to decide where we are going to go for dinner, and figure it all out.
I had a true story of a woman, a client of mine in my dating service and we introduced her to a man and they were supposed to get together for a very first meeting and he called her and just to setup the time and place to meet and he didn't have any suggestions and she was livid and she told him to go away and call her back when he had an idea of where he wanted to go. So, the poor guy did that and called her back several hours later and he suggested to meet in a bar -- in a lobby of one of the major hotels in downtown area, very nice hotel. She was livid -- she was even more livid, because she does not meet men in hotels. She had this whole thing going on that the guy was going to try to get her upstairs in a room in the hotel.
So, this poor guy was doomed, no matter what he did. First, he didn't have a plan. So, she was highly offended that he didn't have a plan and then second he came back with a plan and it wasn't a plan that was a least bit pleasing to her. So, we tried to tell her this. So, it's tougher guys, but the best thing you can do, what we highly recommend is that you have two suggestions. If you are getting together for the very first time for coffee or drinks, that you suggest, two different places and ask her what her preference is. That way, at least you have a plan. Now, if you are going out on a second date, then you should really have an idea of, again two restaurants that you might like to take this woman to.
I know, that lots of times, men feel like Well, you should really let her decide and her choose and let her choose where she wants to go and they think they are doing it to make her more comfortable and they might also say Well, I don't know if she likes Thai food or Vietnamese food or Italian food. So, that's why, have two choices and while you are doing your best to try to be considerate of her, unfortunately for you, all she is thinking is Gosh, can't this guy ever even come up with a plan, because subconsciously it's indicative to her of what the rest of the relationship is like, this man is never going to take initiative. He is never going to have enough oomph to make a decision. It's a little thing, but trust me it will go a long, long way for you guys, if you have a plan for the date.