Are men and women different when it comes to attraction and chemistry?

    Published: 06-16-2009
    Views: 33,447
    Relationship expert Gloria MacDonald discusses dating and sex, including the difference between men and women when it comes to attraction and chemistry.

    My name is Gloria Macdonald and I am a dating and relationship expert. I have a dating service called Perfect Partners and we cater to the 40 plus professional market. I am also co-author of the book 'Laws of the Jungle: Dating for women over 40.

    ' Today, we are talking specifically about dating for men and women over 40 and this segment is a really big one, it's the big question- sex.

    Host: Are men and women different when it comes to attraction and chemistry?

    Gloria Macdonald: Men and women are very different when it comes to attraction and chemistry. We did a lot of research for our book 'Laws of the Jungle: Dating for women over 40.

    " We did focus groups, we did all kinds of surveys and things like that, as well as frankly, my experience with literally hundreds and hundreds of single men and women through my dating service Perfect Partners and there is a difference between attraction and chemistry.

    Men define attraction as four things and this is subconscious level, so that can not necessarily articulate this, but men generally are looking for physical attractiveness and for men, that's beauty, youth and health. So, someone, a woman has to look beautiful, she has to look youthful and she has to look healthy and a part of that is an hour glass figure and it is just a fact of life that for millions of years that hour glass figure has represented fertility. So, men don't recognize it but at a subconscious level they are looking for fertility and beauty, youth and a healthy look are all representations of fertility.

    For women actually, attractiveness generally comes with a look in the face and it has much more to do with how the man presents himself. So, again all kinds of research has been done where women find the man attractive who is wearing the dark suit, the white shirt, the red or burgundy tie, has a Rolex watch. To women, attractiveness is generally, represent someone who can show that they are a good provider, that they have status and that they have a good job and that there is some way in which the man could provide for them physically and also from providing a status to them. So, that's attraction, very different definitions of attraction and chemistry frankly, is fascinating. Men are very simple when it comes to chemistry and women are quite complex when it comes to their definition of chemistry.

    For men, chemistry is -- starts with their attraction to the woman on a physical level and the woman's willingness to have sex, it is just that simple.