How do you deal with turbulence in a relationship?

    Published: 06-16-2009
    Views: 11,025
    Relationship expert Gloria MacDonald discusses her relationship flight school, including how to deal with turbulence in a relationship.

    Host: How do you deal with turbulence in a relationship?

    Gloria MacDonald: If you fly a lot, you know that sooner or later you are going to experience turbulence on a flight or a variety of flights and if you are in a long term relationship you will also experience turbulence in the relationship and it can come from all kinds of things. Maybe your husband is driving you crazy because he doesn't pick up his laundry or maybe your wife is driving you crazy because she nags or she is always late or maybe your are frustrated because your husband has been all Sunday afternoon watching the football game.

    These things will cause turbulence, but the way we get through them is by creating a safe place. Thing about a place where you feel totally comfortable and in ease and peaceful, just close your eyes and imagine that place. Now, imagine bringing your relationship to that place and ask yourself have you created a safe place for your partner? Women all the time who are angry and frustrated and full of resentment because maybe their husband left them for another woman and I ask that woman, "What responsibility are you taking for the downfall of that relationship? Did you create a safe place for your husband? Did you create that place that he could come to when he was feeling down, when he was feeling out, when he was feeling like he didn't have the best day in the world? Did you create that safe place? Did you let him know that he was a king," like we talked about in the previous section? "Did you make him feel good about himself?

    " This works both ways. Men, have you done that for your wife? Have you done that for your girlfriend? Are you creating a safe place for the woman in your life? But again, I think because women are wired for relationship and bonding, more often than not, it's the woman that needs to take responsibility for creating that place of safety that you can come to even in the turbulent times in your relationships.