How important is sex in a relationship?

    Published: 06-16-2009
    Views: 27,990
    Adrian Ashman talks about how important is sex in a relationship.

    Adrian Ashman

    Adrian Ashman is currently Professor of Education and a former Head of School at the University of Queensland in Brisbane, Australia. He was trained in the 1970s as a psychologist at the University of New South Wales in Sydney, Australia, and the University of Alberta, Edmonton, Canada and was elected as a Fellow of the American Psychological Association in 1991. He has operated private psychology practices in Canada and in Australia dealing primarily with adult clients with personal relationship and sexual performance difficulties.

    Adrian has also worked as an educational psychologist and university researcher in the fields of special education and disability since the late-1970s and has consulted with a number of government departments including Education, Community Services and Health, and Employment, Vocational Education, Training and Industrial Relations. Professor Ashman is a trained mediator and has many years experience in conflict resolution.

    Adrian is a keen recreational cyclist and walker, misses flying and sailing, and is very attached to his olive farm to which he and his partner retreat at every possible opportunity.

    Host: How important sex in a relationship? Adrian Ashman: How important is sex in a relationship? Well, it's very important and it's very important particularly at the beginning of a relationship and it's important also to think about sex in terms of sex procreation and sex for the pleasure of that experience. Now, probably, what's important as well to realize is that the importance of sex changes as the relationship matures. At the beginning of a relationship, now, the physical attraction is really strong, as people get together and spend more time with each other and inevitably have sex, the quality of sex changes and the frequency of sex changes. Now, in my practice I have had people who have come in after 30, 40, sometimes, 50 years of their relationship, in a relationship and they will say, The last time I had sex was 23 years ago. I said, Woo! Okay. Is this something you want? I have had other people who have come in and said, We have sex everyday. I go, Woo! Lucky people. But, so it varies from couple to couple and it varies from relationship to relationship. Now, so it doesn t matter whether it's a same sex relationship or an opposite sex relationship. Sex plays a part in the dynamics of that relationship right from the beginning.