Valorie Burton: Yours mine and ours, when two divorced parents with their own sets of children come together, is it really one big happy family? Not without a lot of work.
Couples who plan to remarry may have a difficult road ahead especially when children are involved. A child's loyalty to their absent mother or father can be really intense. At the same time a parent's loyalty to their biological kid versus their step kids can cause other problems.
When families come together, kids are often caught in the middle. Children often walk the tight rope of trying to please both sets of parents. It's important to be sensitive to the adjustments and challenges children face, rather than questioning why they can't just be happy and make the family work.
Creating harmony in a blended family poses many unique challenges. But one thing that helps is simply fostering time together. Set some time aside for a game or craft night that involves the entire family. You can also talk to other parents of blended families and discuss what work best for them, and you can always consult a counselor who has experience with blended families.
A little extra work can get everyone on the same team and moving toward one bigger happy family.