Julie GreenleeJulie Greenlee, Certified Love & Logic Instructor. Julie is currently Program Director at For Children’s Sake Emergency Diagnostic Center, a child placing agency specializing in therapeutic foster care, adoption, and residential treatment. There she works with the most defiant children. She has received trainings on Childhood Differential Diagnoses, Reactive Attachment Disorder, Autism and Asbergers, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Children and Families with HIV/AIDS, and has become a certified facilitator of Love and Logic which is the philosophy and core that For Children's Sake uses to teach both parents, staff, and community members, on appropriate and effective ways to parent and discipline a normal to extremely defiant child.
What are one-liners we can use to save us energy with our children?
Julie Greenlee: On our previous clip, I just talked about the one-liner we use, when dealing with kids that want to argue with us all the time and that line is- I would be happy to talk with you as soon as your voice sound as calm as mine. We do not sink to kid s level when they want to argue with us. We are the Moms and the Dads, we are the authority figures and we do not sink out that level. Another super effective one-liner, if you only have this one line, you will be effective, when dealing with this difficult kids and its- I know . It can be used in every single circumstance.
When I get cussed out at my job and somebody calls me a big fat, U know, blah, blah, blah, I know. You are the worse mom ever, I know. You never do anything that s fair, this family stinks, I know and kids are so shocked that we did not respond to them that we were not offended that they didn t get us that it disarms them. Anything that they just said was totally shut down. Another way to use only one line is a reflective statement. If your kid says, this is unfair, you go, I am sorry that if you think this is unfair. The kid says, you suck as a mom , , I am sorry that you think, I suck as a mom And we use those reflective techniques. It saves us so much time, it saves us so much energy and it really does disarm our kids of all those hateful things that they try to say to make us angry or to make us sad.