What should I do if my child is being bullied?

    Published: 06-16-2009
    Views: 12,757
    Dr. Ted Feinberg of the National Association of School Psychologists discusses options parents have if their children are being bullied.

    Ted Feinberg

    Dr. Feinberg has over 30 years of broad-based human services experience in the mental health field. He has extensive background in consultation and counseling with children, adolescents, adults and families. He has worked in both the public and private sectors. In August 2000, Dr. Feinberg assumed his current position as Assistant Executive Director for Professional Development for the National Association of School Psychologists. His new responsibilities include program development, oversight of advocacy, government and public relations, public policy initiatives, interagency networking as well as professional standards and ethics. Dr. Feinberg has also co-authored two chapters for a Best Practices book on crisis intervention in the schools, book chapters and numerous articles for the NASP Communiqué. Dr. Feinberg was one of the six members of the core workgroup who developed the nationally recognized PREPaRE crisis prevention and intervention training curriculum. Dr. Feinberg has been the Director of Albany Counseling and Crisis Intervention Services and the Senior School Psychologist for the North Colonie Schools near Albany, N.Y. He has been a member of the Graduate School faculties at Russell Sage College, University of New York at Albany, the University of Maryland and George Mason University. Dr. Feinberg completed his doctoral and postdoctoral training at the University of New York at Albany. In October 1995, the New York State Association of School Psychologists selected Dr. Feinberg as Practicioner of the Year. Dr. Feinberg completed his second trip to Panama where he assisted the United States Department of Defense with their reduction in force efforts. He was one of the founding members and Chairman for the NASP National Emergency Assistance team and has volunteered his time to do crisis intervention training and disaster mental health work for the American Red Cross and the National Organization for Victim Assistance. Dr. Feinberg was the team leader for NEAT/NOVA in Spotsylvania, Virginia where three adolescent girls from the community were abducted, molested and murdered. In April 1999, he was invited to Littleton, Colorado after the worst school shooting tragedy in US history to consult with school and community members impacted by the horrific event. Dr. Feinberg was the keynote speaker for the New York State Governors’ Conference on the Prevention of School Violence on March 5, 1999. He was also appointed to then Governor Pataki’s New York State Blue Ribbon Task Force on School Violence.

    Speaker: What should I do if my child is being bullied? Should I stay out of it?

    Dr. Ten Feinberg: Parents should not stay out of their childs life, if they are being bullied. Quite the contrary, children, who are being bullied feel a sense of vulnerability, and pain and what they are looking for are adults, who will understand that pain and take steps to make that difficulty go away. So, if you suspect that your children is being bullied and you have some evidence to support that, its important to contact the school, contact the teacher, indicate that you have these concerns and check as to whether the teacher is seeing these types of behavior that are concerning you in school as well.

    Its important that schools to have a well articulated and enforceable anti-bullying policy, and that should be in writing, and that should clear not only to the children in the school, but to their parents and to outside community agencies as well. A policy that isnt enforced is not worth, the paper its printed on, and so children need to know that if they come to an adult with concerns about being bullied thats something will be done. It wont be just glossed over or ignored because children again, if they are being bullied they need to help and support and they cant remedy that situation nor should they be asked to remedy that situation on their own.